Everyone loves their comfort zone. It’s nice and warm, and non-confrontational there. We know what the day will be like and we don’t have to run into things we’re uncomfortable with.
But life in your comfort zone can get boring. If you do the same safe things every day, you’ll never grow as a person. And I’d like to hope we’re all trying to grow and change every day.
Leaving your comfort zone is scary, anxiety-inducing, and overall uncomfortable. But it’s the best uncomfortable feeling you’ll ever have.
I want to share my story of stepping out of my comfort zone, how you can move out of your own comfort zone, and why you need to in the first place.
Self care is an important part of our lives. It can range from having a night to yourself with a face mask and some candles, to making sure you’re caring for your whole self in terms of showering and eating right.
Us Millennials lead exhausting lives. Between student loan debt to working to trying to keep up with a social life, time to yourself can be hard to come by. When life stresses you out to the point where you’re getting a full night’s sleep and still waking up exhausted, it’s time for some self care.
Relationships are a complicated thing. Especially if you’ve been single for a while and you’re pining for one. They require so much effort to make sure there’s a balance between you and your partner.
But what happens when you’ve been single for too long? Or you keep dating the wrong kind of people that disappoint you? Maybe you keep finding yourself swiping left instead of right.
What if I told you that the reason you’re having all this bad luck in the relationship department isn’t because you didn’t forward that chain email back in the late 90s, but yourself?
Days when your depression creeps up on you are pretty damn annoying, if I say so myself. I hate when I wake up in the morning and yesterday was completely fine, but today my depression decided I’m not be able to get out of bed, want to cry more than usual, and really can’t bother with making myself presentable for work.
Depression days are rough and the best way to combat them is to be prepared for when they show up. I’m going to go through the things that I keep and have in place for when my depression rears its ugly head and tries to get in the way of my life.
Breakups are hard. There’s no doubt about it. Whether that be for a relationship, friendship or family member, having to break yourself away from anyone is a huge feat, especially if you’ve had a relationship with this person or persons for multiple years.
Most people think breakups are just for romantic relationships, but they’re really not. Sometimes people in our lives aren’t exactly healthy for our own sanity and emotional well being. And breaking away from these people can be one of the hardest things a person has to do.
So how do you deal with breaking up with someone? I’m going to give you my advice for when I’ve had situations like this before.
Recently, Forbes released an article stating that women have finally made it to the more dominant sex in the workforce. Granted, it’s only at 50.04%, but that now makes it so women are in more jobs than ever before.
That’s a great thing! More people in jobs means more money for people, and people like money. It’s a great thing that the traditionally female dominant fields and that they’re growing. Traditional gender roles of the woman staying at home are being smashed to the ground
But what do you do if you don’t want to smash those gender roles? What if you actually want to be a housewife?
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What if I Want to Be a Housewife?
I never thought I’d have these thoughts. For years I was brought up to believe I would enter the workforce just like everyone else and work for the rest of my life until (re: if)I retire.
I never knew what I wanted to do with my life, especially as a career. I never had any strive to be something other than stable and happy. (I go over some of that in my post When What You Want to Be When You Grow Up Isn’t a Career Choice)
I always knew I wanted to write, so I started up a blog. Actually, I started many blogs. This is the just the most recent and most kept one. But I didn’t know anything else. I always felt lost when people would ask me what I wanted to do after high school or college. I never knew and I still don’t know, if you ask me about a job.
I currently don’t mind my day job, but ever since I’ve hit 30 and realized what I wanted to do with my life, I’ve wanted to find a husband and be a homemaker or a housewife. I still don’t know about kids, that’s a completely different subject, but I definitely want to have a home and take care of it.
Why a Housewife?
Right now, I’m working because I have to. I need money in order to pay my bills and survive. But I’d rather be keeping a home, and making sure my family is at its best. While updating my blog accordingly, of course.
Apparently, I’m not the only millennial woman who is embracing more traditional gender roles. According to a NY Post article back in 2017 it’s becoming a more common ideal that women are embracing being a stay at home mom, or a housewife instead of going back into the work force. And I don’t blame them. I don’t want to work, especially doing things I really don’t want to do.
If I didn’t have to work, that would be amazing. However, I wouldn’t want to give up working entirely. Part time blogger, full time housewife. Yeah, that sounds about right. I could keep doing something I love, have the social interaction I need, as well as have some sort of income to myself, but also do what I really want, in keeping a home.
I went through my independent phase during college and the years after it. I was determined to never need anyone, be by myself for the long run, and that was that. But as I’ve gotten older I’ve softened up, learned to break apart that cold, concrete wall around myself, and learn to be okay with wanting love.
I want a partner, a pet or two, and a home I can call my own. I don’t want to deal with landlords and shitty apartment buildings. And I’m working on all of this now. The Single Housewife posts are my way of learning how to be well… a housewife!
Writing is in my blood. I’ve always been writing, whether it be blog posts, stories, poems, whatever. My room is full of notebooks, mostly full of blog research now, but I also have a container with stories I wrote in childhood that I won’t let go of.
I started writing a Harry Potter fan fiction when I was in the 5th grade for an assignment. It turned into a series that still isn’t finished. I hope to one day digitize it all so I can keep it safe. But that’s a series I’ve been writing since I was 10. I’m now 30. That’s 20 years of writing!
One of the few things I was able to take away from trying to find myself, was that I want to help people. Helping people makes me happy. Writing makes me happy. So I put them together.
Blogging gives me an outlet to tell my stories, help other, and potentially become a side hustle that makes money. (Which I’m in the process of doing now.) So being a blogger makes it easier to be at home, because that would be where I’d be working. It would give me more incentive to keep things clean, tidy, and running smoothly because I’d have to see it every day.
I also want the satisfaction of creating something successful. I’ve never really been one for creating a business, but I’ve always wanted to write books to some degree. That’s why the only real way I want to monetize this blog is by selling e-books and courses, with the occasional affiliate post.
Can You Be a Single Housewife?
To some extent, yes! I plan on exploring this more in another post, but the gist of it is to be a single homemaker. I just think Single Housewife sounds better. It’s the oxymoron bit of things. And it paints a better picture in my mind.
I want to explore things like cooking, baking, cleaning, organizing, decorating, how to host a party, etc.
I want to do things a housewife would traditionally do. I think I would like that and have more time for myself. That’s my biggest thing about all of this.
My mental health fluctuates between stressed and out of control based on how my work life is going. Taking away the biggest stressor in my life sounds like a good way to fix that problem. But that creates a new problem of money and support. If you want to support me in my journey, there are links to my Ko-Fi page and Amazon wish list on the sidebar, and you can also head over to the ebooks section and sign up to receive updates on my latest ebook!
- Work is stressful. But I have to do it to survive. We all do.
- I rather be at home cleaning, organizing, or decorating.
- I’m not the only millennial who is reverting back to more traditional gender roles.
- I want to learn to be better at cooking, baking, etc.
- I’m ready to start my own “family”.
- Being a Single Housewife will give me time for me and for blogging.
What do you think of my want to be a housewife? Should I strive to be more in this day and age?
Recently there was a big change at my work place. It basically turned the whole company upside down, and it took a big tole on everyone emotionally. Unfortunately, it definitely threw me into a depression spiral. It took me a while to realize I was binge eating everything in sight, and neglecting myself, but when I did I needed a good weekend to get myself back on track. And it worked.
My soon-to-be-released ebook, Depressive Moments: a Self Care Guide for Days When Depression Hits Hardest goes into a much greater detail of how to deal with depression days (and a whole lot more!), but I wanted to write a guide to go along with that. A guide you can follow, and that I have followed, to deal with depression days.
So I’m going to give you my ultimate guide to dealing with a depression day (or days) in one weekend!
If you have been diagnosed with a mental health illness, you know all too well that any kind of increased stress can cause your mental health to crash a little. It depends on how you react to stressors in your life, as everyone reacts differently, but stress can seriously affect you and your life simply by being there!
The intricate medical links between the two are still being uncovered and researched but it is known that stress can cause depression and/or anxiety in people. Increased stress equals increased chances. If you already have depression and anxiety it can trigger your reactions to be worse than usual.
I’m recently going through this right now, as there was a huge change at my workplace, and it hasn’t been fun. I’m going to write about how stress is making my life harder, as well as some things you can do to help alleviate those symptoms.
This may seem like a silly thing, that you might not know who you are, but it’s definitely a thing. I went through it. It’s sort of like an identity crisis. Usually prompted by one of the 5 Existential Crises You’ll Go Through Before You’re 30, I would just be lost. I wouldn’t know anything about myself. Add Impostor Syndrome to feeling lost, and you really have no idea what’s going on.
It can be hard to get out of that cycle of not knowing who you are, especially if you were brought up to be a certain way and that isn’t what you want. If you finally have the freedom to do anything, that freedom becomes the biggest problem in the world. You can literally choose from anything, and that’s a lot of options.
Here are a few basic questions to ask yourself if you don’t know who you are, or are feeling lost with yourself.
I recently turned 30 in September, and even though it’s only been a few months, my entire life seems to have changed. My views and wants are different, and I’m past the more “trial and error” part of my life and want to impart some wisdom on those of you just starting out in your 20s or who need a little help half way through.
Your 20s are a time to experiment with your life and figure out who you really are. There are going to be times where you need to hunker down and get things done, but otherwise, they should be some of the better times in your life.